Do you get listened to?

The more
power you have,
the more people will listen respectfully
to your story. 
Consequently,
listening to someone’s story is a way
of empowering them, of validating
their intrinsic worth
as a human being.

~ Kay Pranis

I read this quote recently and it really resonated with me.

It’s something I have become more aware of in the last year or so…how I listen, who is heard… and I am exploring ways of being more inclusive  when I am at gatherings, dinner parties, celebrations…and when I am one on one with someone.

I do sense the speaking/listening is partly about power and perhaps it is also about habit, and about the thoughts each of us carry about our worth in this culture that we live in.

I wonder if people who generally have the floor are not aware that they have it, not aware that it might not be balanced.

If you have been listened to often in your life I wonder if it’s sort of invisible…that you don’t see it as something others don’t get as much of.

If its true (which for me it feels deeply true) that being listened to does empower people, does help them see and acknowledge their sense of intrinsic worth, that it is very important for all of us…

How do you begin to bring about change in your own life, your own speaking and listening?

 

The first step is to be an observer, to take a step back when you are with others and to notice how you listen, how you are heard.

Reflect on how you are in conversation. Are you someone who gets the floor often?  Are you someone who asks and listens?  Or are you somewhere in the middle?

Then the next step would be listening more if you speak often and speaking more if you listen often…simple…not easy…

The third step, which I have already been exploring, is to create different structures that set the stage for more inclusion and mutuality.  

Recently we had a couple families over and I suggested during dinner that we each share one or two things we had experienced over the summer that we loved.  Everyone spoke, everyone was heard, it was sweet.

I love being a part of and interacting in environments where everyone’s voice is heard. I am continuing to explore and create opportunities to bring this forward in our world. I hope you will join me!

What are your thoughts about this topic?  Please comment, share!

How do you bring about shared listening in your relationships?

Having these conversations, considering, being curious about doing and being different…I know that these small things support me to remember my wholeness…what about you?

To everyone being heard,

Carol

Helping people who are stressed and want more ease and aliveness…move toward that…through deep listening, daily practices and support.

www.intobalancecoaching.com

carol@intobalancecoaching.com

Call or email for a complimentary coaching session

Advertisement